My mom’s evening makeup

Since I was small I had looked at my mom putting her makeup on daily basis. In the morning and evening, even on her days off. I remember her trying different ways, always trying our new lines, new colors. Every time i saw her putting makeup in the evening after shower, i was asking her is she is going out, but she would always say ‘NO”, when i will ask her why she is putting her makeup, she would say “Just like this”.

When I grew a bit older, my mom’s habit dd not change, still the same morning makeup and evening and always during her days off.

Now my mom is retired and she is most of the time at home, but makeup is always on, in the morning and in the evening.

No like my mom at all, i was always preferred free make up look, i loved my hair simply straight down and with age i have started to apply aging preventing creams and oils. Very very occasionally, due to some events, i would put my self together but applying BB cream and Mascara, and again no lipstick.

One day during the family dinner, my father said to me, that i should use makeup, and start to look after myself, “you are not a teenager anymore`’ he said. Though during my teenage days I loved putting makeup but he always scolded me for that, but this not why i don’t like makeup. I don’t like putting make up because the make up i able to put is very simple, even if i put it on, people will never see the difference, the reason i can not make complicated makeup with super eye lines and do smoky eyes, because my left eye is very week and i can not see with it properly, so if i close the right eyes i can not draw the pretty lines, so no matter how hard I try my eyes are always uneven. But i can never say this to my parents, in order not to make them worry.

But back to my mom. Once i had my friend visit my family with me fore few days. He was really amazed by the way we follow the traditions at home and how clean my mom can be in terms of the household. He was telling the story about this visit to everyone. And once, while telling the same story to one of our friends he said that he never saw a woman as my mom, he said that my mom should be an example to all women. He has notice that my mom will brush her hair and change her close to take the trash been outside and she was always does her make up retouch in the evening before my father come home from work. BEFORE MY FATHER COME HOME FROM WORK. So this how i have learned why my mom was putting evening make up on everyday, till now, on daily basis, for more then 35 years.


My Grandfather’s song

Many years had passed, I think my Grand Father was already 70, when I have witness the meeting of my grandfather and his first wife.

She had recovered and left the city, married and had another daughter, and thanks to the daughters they have reunited after many, many years. They could not look straight into each other eyes and I felt more sadness for my Grand Mom, because at that moment she felt very uncomfortable. They exchange few words in Korean, she refused to stay for dinner and left. It was the last time they have ever met.

It’s been almost 5 years since my grandfather left this world, to continue his life with the pretty angels. He was sick for about a year straggling with the failed liver. I saw him for the last time just a month before he died.

Only after he left, my Grand Mom had started to talk about her life with him, I have never knew till then how unhappy and how angry she was all those times. She was keep on saying that my grand father never loved her, never cared about her, because he could never forget his first wife and forgive himself for giving up on her. Thou for my Grand mom it was a love marriage, he was in love with my granddad when they have met, as for my grand dad is was just an arranged thing, he was forced into that by his own aunt and older brother.

I don’t know if he met his first wife in heaven, but I hope they did. I hope they had a very long conversation and said to each other all what they had to say for so many years. I AM SORRY, I LOVE YOU, I FORGIVE YOU.

But i will always remember my grandfather singing to my grandmother on her 60th birthday. I remember the tears of my uncles and aunties, because to was his token of appreciation for all those years. It was the only time for many people who knew him, including me and my parents, including my aunties and uncles. it was for the first time and the last time we all heard him sing.

Next week i am going to see my grandmother, and when I am going to her a hug i am gonna hold her tight like no one did before, and i am gonna tell her that I love her, like no one told her before.


My Grandfather’s favourite Child

I remember that day when I have learned the story about the other wedding.

I was not a small girl any more and very much matured, and when I finally asked my mother about it, i was sure she would tell me everything, because, remember, i was her spy,

– don’t tell me you didn’t know it yet?

I was surprised about my Mom’s reaction, and she said

– I thought your older cousin has already told you everything.

– My older cousin?

– Your cousins mother is your grandfather’s daughter from the first wife.

– So my grandma is his second wife? and she is not my aunty’s mother?

– yes, But this is something you should not talk about, I hope you understand.

The story i have learned from my mom was short. My grand father had a first wife, who was diagnosed with tuberculosis right after giving the birth to their daughter, and she was in the hospital for a long time with no way to see her and no way for her to be dismissed.Those time there was no cure for it and anyone who has been diagnosed with it had very little chances for life. So after a year of waiting, my grand father had married my grand mom.

During next years after i learn the truth, i started to understand about so many past comments to conversations i have heard.

I learned that my Grand father loved his first wife a lot and she was very beautiful, though he was a play boy, a very handsome playboy she won his heart.

I have noticed that my Oldest Aunt so much not alike to the rest children in the family and I have noticed that she loved her step mom a lot and they did get along well, and she always remained as my grandfather’s favourite child.

to be continued…

My Grandfather’s Other wedding

After I moved to a new school it took me a while to adjust, but thanks to my first teacher, i was a disappointment for my new teacher.

Of day my grand parents finally visited us and i was waiting for my grand father with the school group foot from the previous school.

– GrandDaddy, my first teacher look at her. Do you remember her? she said she knows you and she was at your weeding.

My Grand father looked at the picture for a while and said that it was so long ago he doesn’t remember.

Then i gave the same picture to my GrandMom and asked her.

– She was at your wedding, may be you can remember her?

she looked at the picture and said in Korean

– I think it was the other wedding.

By that time i have learn to hide my ability to understand Korean, because i used to play the game called Spy and i was my Mom’s spy every time I was with my father’s parents.

OTHER WEDDING was in my mind for a long time, i think it took almost 10 years to find out what she meant.

My Grand Mom was my grand father’s second wife.

to be continued…

My First Teacher’s First Love

I don’t remember much from my first year at school because in the middle of it I had to switch from one school to another, but the first school I remember only because of two particular things. The boy who was sitting at the same desk with me and my Teacher.

It was couple of month before i left the school, we had a tea party in our class room and my teacher asked me where will i speak my break.

– I will spend it at my Grandparent place out side the city in the village

– Where is it?

– it is the village that located next to the biggest tomb hill

My teacher looked at me for and took few seconds before saying

– I know this village, this is were i started to work as a teacher. I bet you know the old man who drives the yellow milk truck.

– Of cause i know him

I was so happy and i was laughing loud while replying to my teacher and i said

– Its my Grand Daddy

I don’t remember, what was her reaction when i said that, but she kept on asking me question until she was convinced that I was my grandfather’s granddaughter.

After this day, i also remember my father coming to school and talking to her. I remember her telling him how much he resembles his father, and she was right, my father was a spitting image of my grandfather as I am of my father. And i remember she said that she was at my grandfather’s wedding.

Then I move the school, but i never knew till now that this was a reason, i had to leave the school and the boy who was sitting next to me.

to be continued ….