Lessons of one sided love

one day

the day will come and you will tell me

that you have done, and no more waiting

for love that never had reply

for love and time that had passed by

One day

That day then i will tell you

that It’s been long, but worth of waiting

that I have always knew you’d come

because the waiting all I’ve done

I’ll tell you

that watching you to love another

was painful but at the same

it was a lesson to be patient

it was a lesson how to love

But now

i am gonna wait for day to come

and keep on watching keep on learning

those lessons of one sided love

that you’re so good at teaching


My Heart….


my hand is laying on my chest

and i am slowly saying “go Ahead”

if you are strong then you can win it

despite the mind is in control

you have been dominant for ages

why suddenly you wanna fight?

why suddenly against all odds?

why suddenly its all about love?

and i will follow you, because i am tired

and i will let you lead me through

together you and I will have to cry it

but this time may be I want it too

Lets dry the ocean and pick the stars

because the love will let us

my Heart, i am counting on you

let fall for it and regret later


You heal my thought and my desires

You heal me every single day

Your eyes you nose your lips is magic

The powers you have is so beyond

You healed my life with your appearance

You gave me one more chance to breathe

I am survivor and i am patient

You are my rescuer , you are my cure

With every look that  you have gave me

I am much stronger then before

With every second that you love me

I am much better woman then before

And every time you are around me

i feel so safe and so secured

you are healer, my inspiration

i am so calm, so loved when i am with you

Believe can not be different

why do you think that  my believe is different?

it teaches me to trust and how to love

now tell me if its different

i know it teaches you the same way to your life

and as for me for you its always in your heart

and as for mine your soul is his creation

when you address him looking into sky

And so am i and so am i

will your believe will tell you kill them?

no, it will always say use love

and my believe will never harm you

and it  will always teach me to be kind

we both sometimes a bit inpatient

and both sometimes can blame them all

but all we learn from this believing

its never ever lose the hope

now think of it and call me sister

we both the same, we both believe

in somebody above us

in somebody who knows our names

how many heavens there could be?

how many doors for us to pass through

i do believe and you believe

forgiveness can’t be different

My hate and love

his is so opposite of what i have imagined

about man i would so fall in love

I hate his smile, his voice does drive crazy

but yet i love to listen when he talks

I even think sometimes that i’ve been punished

for looking and for waiting someone else

right now he’s sleeping right beside me

the man i hate and love the most

that thinest line between my feelings

i am trying hard to find

because when i will cut the borders

all that i want to have for him is love


when i have said goodbyes to all my past relations 

when i have said enough to crying all alone

when i have finally decided trying living

this when i’ve realized i want to love again


Its all because my heart is never tiered

or hurt by thorns of love and being scratched

I guess it always heals by new beginnings 

I guess it always ready for a marathon

and every time i promise to myself i won’t abuse it

and at the same time dive so deep into the pumps of it





there is someone in this world who hates me

for something i have said or ‘ve done

and there is someone in this world who loves me

for just a silly smile i smiled


if you are one i’ve hurt; forgive me

and if you love me come to me

if your hate helps then please continue

if you still love me; please love me still


for me it means that i am just a human

and it has proof that you’re alive

for me its just believe that feelings

is guiding our souls through lives


there is someone in this world i hate

for something they have said or ‘ve done 

there is one someone that i can love

for letting me to smile that silly smile 




Today one of my facebook friends had liked a status of one man, it was a very sad post about how he misses someone, how it has been a year since he saw that person for a last time, He called her an angel and described how painful was their last good bye.

I got curious and i started click by click learn more about that man, a man i have never met in my life a man who had change my thought of life and made me feel that my life is not all bad and i need to learn how to be more happy every day and cherish the love of people around me.

This man lives in the same city as me, and at first after looking at his recent post i would say that he has normal life, by his posted pictures i could see him enjoying the company of his friends or how he enjoyed the day at the beach, and his status said that he is married, i clicked and clicked and scrolled and scrolled.

they got married about 2 years ago and after 6 month the picture of his wife were different, still with the bright smile but with the sign that she was ill. I could see their love for each other through all the pain they went through, their love was a weapon they used to protect their time together. She passed away about a year ago and he still carry her in his heart, he still misses her and he often tag her name in his posts as if she was still with him in this life. 

In a moment i felt like writing him a message and tell him that i hear his sorrow and i wish he would recover fast, but then i already saw how he is surrounded by so many friends and i felt like he might think i am psycho.

There was as well a video last video they have made together, its a thank you video to his friends from all over the world who helped them with their donations, i can say she was not a person who would give up easily she would still brightly smile.

This is how that random person had change me today, this is how that person captivated my thoughts and i wish one day i have a chance to meet him personally, hold his hand and tell him “thank you and you are going to be alright”

I hope he would not hate me for going through his life via facebook.


xoxo Nat



I loved you before

when words has been vanished and feelings are gone

when tears are dried out and hearts say no more

and rather i say ” i hate you right now”

and stand here and say ” I loved you before”

before not right now, out hearts were as one

the look at each other was signal of love

and it was so wild and crazy and kind,

the love that we have no longer to find

Lets turn us away before we are fine

before we could hate before we could lie

before we could lose the moment to say

“I loved you so much with heart and my mind”

No need to look back and search for an answers

no need for excuses no need for a chance

we need to begin our lives from beginning

and open our hearts for new love to come